In the world of online dating, a simple message can spark hope, but behind the screen, sincerity isn’t always easy to spot. While genuine connections are possible, knowing how to distinguish authenticity from illusion is essential to protect your heart and find real love.
Why is it so difficult to measure a person’s sincerity online?
On a dating site, everything seems simpler… and yet, at the same time, everything can become blurred. Behind a screen, it’s easy to mince your words, to choose the perfect photo, to erase the little flaws that make us so unique. Anonymity gives you the freedom to express yourself, but it also gives others the freedom… to invent a life that doesn’t exist.
As an online relationship consultant, I’ve met many people who were disappointed after a virtual crush. I remember one client who thought she’d found “the perfect man”: funny, caring, always online at the right time. But every time she suggested a video call, the person always came up with an excuse before disappearing without a trace.
When she proposed a video call, he first invented disappeared. It was only after some searching that she discovered her photos had been uploaded from Instagram and belonged to an American model.
And she’s not alone. A French study revealed that almost a quarter of adults have already fallen victim to some form of online romance scam. That’s how deceptive words and images can sometimes be.
But rest assured: even in this digital world where appearances can be deceptive, there are clear signals that can help you recognize authenticity. And that’s exactly what we’re going to explore together, to keep your exchanges pleasant, but lucid.
Also read: First steps on a dating app: the simple guide to daring to take the plunge
Signs that a person is sincere
Finding someone genuine on a dating site is a bit like searching for a rare pearl among thousands of seashells. The good news is that there are clear clues that can help you tell whether the person behind the screen is playing it straight… or wearing a mask.
1. Consistency in the information shared
When someone is sincere, their story remains the same, no matter when or how you ask. If, in your first exchanges, they tell you they live in Bordeaux and work in design, you’ll find these details later, naturally slipped into other conversations.
Inconsistencies – a changing age, a changing profession or contradictory memories – are often a sign that there’s something to hide. As an online relationship coach, I always advise: listen as much as you read. Details don’t lie.
2. Regular engagement in conversation
A sincere profile doesn’t just send you a “Hi, how are you?” every three days. It builds the exchange, bounces off your answers and, above all… asks you questions.
A real interest is seen in curiosity: knowing what you like to eat, where you’d like to travel or what made you smile today.
According to a Meetic survey of singles, 38% say an original description plays a decisive role in falling in love, while 29% are sensitive to a well-thought-out first message
3. The presence of emotions and vulnerability
Sincerity also means daring to show yourself as you really are. Authentic people share personal anecdotes, recount a childhood memory or evoke a difficult period in their lives, without lapsing into melodrama.
They might say, for example: “I used to be afraid of embarking on an online relationship… but I figure I’ve got to give it a try”. This kind of transparency creates a deeper bond and proves that the other person isn’t just trying to seduce you, but to really connect.
4. The absence of haste or suspicious financial interest
Sincerity takes its time. If someone is honest, they’ll never ask you for money, try to get you to leave the platform as soon as you start chatting, or speed things up in a way that makes you uncomfortable.
Conversely, fake profiles often want to move on to private messaging very quickly… or move you with a story designed to get something out of you. A golden rule to know: a sincere person will always respect your limits and won’t force you to send them money without meeting you.
5. The desire to move towards more real interaction
When online conversations start to feel enjoyable and meaningful, a genuine person will naturally want to take the next step, whether that’s a video call or meeting for coffee in a public place.
They won’t make excuses to avoid showing their face or keep postponing the meeting indefinitely. As someone who guides individuals seeking love online, I can assure you: sincerity is also revealed by the other person’s willingness to embrace the relationship beyond the screen.
In short, authenticity isn’t measured by a single action, but by a consistent pattern of behavior. If your conversations are open, oriented toward a real-life meeting, filled with genuine emotion, and free from pressure or hidden financial motives, then you’re likely dealing with someone who is being honest and sincere.
Also read: Complete guide to avoiding scams and fake profiles on dating sites
Warning signs that should worry you
In love, we all want to believe. But on a dating site, it’s better to keep your eyes open to avoid unpleasant surprises. Some signs are unmistakable, not necessarily proof that someone has bad intentions, but they should raise a red flag and prompt you to verify things before moving forward.
1. An Incomplete or Inconsistent Profile
A blank or hastily filled-out profile may hide someone who isn’t on the site for the right reasons. If you notice contradictions, such as a different city listed in their bio versus what they say in conversation, or a complete lack of personal details, be cautious.
Truly sincere individuals have nothing to hide and feel comfortable presenting themselves clearly.
As a relationship coach guiding people through online dating, I’ve seen many singles swept off their feet by mysterious profiles… only to later discover that the mystery was actually a cover-up for deception.
2. Constant Refusal to Share Recent Photos or Do a Video Call
An honest person interested in a real connection will have no issue sending a recent photo or turning on their camera, even for a short video call.
If every time you suggest a video chat, you’re met with excuses, poor connection, broken camera, an endlessly busy schedule, it’s often a major red flag.
Fake profiles avoid face-to-face interaction at all costs because they know it would expose the truth.
3. Messages That Are Too Perfect or Too Quick to Express Feelings
Declaring love after just two days might sound romantic… but it can sometimes be a well-rehearsed tactic. A script-like message, overly smooth and filled with excessive compliments from the very first exchanges, should raise your guard.
Emotional scammers use this method to quickly build trust and affection, only to later ask for money.
4. Requests for Money or Sensitive Information
This is the ultimate red flag. Whether it’s an urgent medical bill, an airplane ticket, or an “unexpected” expense, any financial request from someone you’ve never met in person should be treated as suspicious.
Likewise, be wary if they ask for your exact address, personal identification documents, or bank details. A genuine person respects your privacy and safety.
5. Classic “Catfishing” Traps
“Catfishing” refers to creating a fake identity to deceive and manipulate someone online. This might involve stolen photos (of someone else entirely) or a completely fabricated life story designed to win your trust.
Common scenarios follow a familiar pattern: someone living abroad who plans to visit you soon, a soldier on a secret mission, or a busy professional always traveling. While these stories may sound appealing, they often serve to explain why a real meeting never happens, and to pave the way for a future financial request.
Always trust your intuition. If something feels too good to be true… it probably is. Online love can be wonderful, but it should always go hand in hand with vigilance.
Also read: 5 common mistakes to avoid when looking for a serious relationship online
How can you tell if someone is really sincere on a dating site?
You’ve felt a strong connection, but your gut is telling you to double-check whether the person on the other end is really who they claim to be. That’s completely normal, and actually, highly recommended! Here are a few simple and effective techniques I personally use to guide my clients through safe and meaningful online dating experiences.
1. Perform a Reverse Image Search
You’ve received a nice photo, but you want to make sure it’s genuine? Free tools like Google Images or TinEye are your best allies. Simply upload the photo or paste its URL into the search bar, and you’ll quickly see if it appears elsewhere online, on other profiles, stock photo sites, or unrelated websites.
This is a fast and reliable way to spot fake profiles using stolen images.
2. Check Consistency Across Social Media
Most sincere people have at least one social media profile (Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn) linked to their real identity. A quick search on these platforms can often confirm the details they’ve shared: age, places they’ve visited, hobbies, mutual friends, etc.
Be aware: some scammers do create fake social media accounts, but these are often inactive, have few real interactions, or lack authentic content. Genuine profiles usually show a natural digital footprint over time.
3. Subtly Test Their Responses
A technique I frequently recommend: ask the same question at different times, phrased differently. For example, if you first ask where they grew up, bring up the topic again later by mentioning a childhood memory. If their answers don’t match or seem inconsistent, it could be a sign they’re making things up.
This is a discreet and gentle way to assess honesty without making the other person uncomfortable.
4. Use Built-in Safety Tools on Dating Platforms
Modern dating sites and apps often include security features to protect users. On Chat&Yamo, for instance, we’ve implemented several safety measures, such as:
- Profile verification via email or phone,
- Reporting system for suspicious behavior,
- Anti-spam filters and active moderation.
Don’t underestimate these tools, they can alert you to potential risks even before you start chatting. Personally, I always advise prioritizing reputable platforms that invest in member safety.
Conclusion
Detecting sincerity on a dating site is a delicate balance between trust and caution. By learning to recognize genuine signs, spot red flags, and use the right tools, you greatly increase your chances of building a real and lasting relationship. Remember: love always begins with a sincere connection, but also with listening closely to your intuition.
Also read: Profile on dating apps: missteps to avoid
FAQ : Online Dating – Your Questions on Sincerity and Safety
1. How can I test someone’s sincerity online?
To assess whether someone is genuine, pay attention to the consistency of their information, the quality of your conversations, and their willingness to move toward more real interactions, such as a video call. You can also use simple tools like reverse image search to verify the authenticity of their photos. On Chat-Yamo, we encourage these best practices by offering features that support profile verification and secure communication.
2. What are the signs of a fake profile?
Warning signs include an incomplete profile, inconsistent details, repeated refusal to share recent photos or go on a video call, overly fast declarations of love, or requests for money. Chat-Yamo is committed to moderating profiles to minimize fake accounts and ensure a safe, trustworthy environment for all users.
3. Is it possible to fall in love on a dating site?
Absolutely! More and more couples are meeting and forming meaningful relationships through online dating. The key is to stay authentic and patient, taking the time to truly get to know the other person beyond the screen. Chat-Yamo is designed to foster sincere connections by prioritizing quality conversations and respecting each individual’s pace.
4. How can I avoid falling victim to romance scams?
Stay alert to financial requests or stories that seem too perfect to be true. Take time to verify profiles, ask thoughtful questions, and make full use of the platform’s built-in security tools. Chat-Yamo provides reporting features and regular monitoring to protect members from such risks.
5. Why choose an app like Chat-Yamo for online dating?
Because it combines simplicity, security, and respect for its users. Chat-Yamo is dedicated to creating a space where sincerity can thrive, featuring verified profiles and tools that promote authentic, meaningful interactions. Your journey to love deserves the safest and most supportive environment possible.
